- in Resilience by Tony
Self-confidence or just arrogant
We live in a society where people go to great lengths to achieve that perfect selfie. Some individuals even make a pretty hefty living off their looks.
These individuals are normally defined by the attention they receive but when the most significant determinant of self-esteem is only based on a person’s aesthetics, unhealthy patterns can develop.
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The selfie-obsessed world we live in walks a fine line between self-confidence and utter narcissism. Countless individuals find gratification from their online profile; so much so, they base their entire self-worth on how many likes, friends or followers they have.
This lifestyle and attitude carry significant emotional risks, as well as often masking a shallow existence and low-self-esteem.
Three characteristics are often associated with each other when describing human behaviour. While the three frequently overlap, they couldn’t be far from different.
Those three traits are:
- Arrogance
- Narcissism
- Self-confidence
We all want to develop healthy self-confidence. Therefore, it’s best to understand the difference between the three to achieve that goal of high self-esteem.
Let’s consider the definition of these three terms and compare their attributes:
What Is Narcissism
Narcissism is characterized by the pursuit of ego gratification, vanity, and a sense of superiority, grandiosity, dominance, and entitlement. Narcissism is part of the ‘dark tetrad’ of personality that also includes Machiavellianism, psychopathy, and sadism.
Individuals on the spectrum for Narcissistic Personality Disorder are manipulative folks who are only out for personal gain. They view themselves with grandiosity and have a difficult time showing real empathy for others. However, they can put on a display of sympathy if they feel it will benefit themselves.
Unfortunately, those with NPD are emotionally abusive to the people in their lives. So much so, researchers align their personality symptoms with those on the spectrum for psychopathy disorder. Therefore, it goes far beyond taking selfies and accruing likes.
What Is Arrogance
We probable know arrogant people in our lives, and we may also throw around the word “narcissistic” when referring to them. However, there is typically a significant difference between arrogance and narcissism, and it’s worth acknowledging.
Narcissists are also arrogant when it comes to their skill level, but to a dysfunctional degree, Arrogance is defined as thinking you are better or more qualified than those around you.
It’s a grandiose sense of self that goes far beyond self-confidence. Arrogant individuals have a hard time making and keeping friends because they often rub others the wrong way.
Perversely, this arrogance very often stems from a lack of self-belief, and the behaviour is expressed as a way to hide this from others.
What Is Self-Confidence
Confidence comes from a Latin word fidere’ which means “to trust”; therefore, having self-confidence is having trust in one’s self
Having a healthy self-confidence means believing that you can accomplish anything while remaining humble, or not feeling driven to display how clever you are. Balancing the two is a big part of being an emotionally well-rounded individual.
Also, those with a healthy sense of self-confidence have no problem with uplifting others. They don’t view other people as competition. Instead, they applaud others when they see them succeed.
They understand that someone else’s gains do not take away from theirs. This is what differentiates self-confidence from the other personality traits discussed.
The underlying root of arrogance and narcissism is insecurity. People with these traits feel as if they have to make themselves appear more substantial to compensate for deeply ingrained insecurities. This is also why they tend to exhibit negative or cruel behavioural patterns.
How to Develop Self-Confidence
It was the Greek philosopher Aristotle who first wrote about traits (dispositions) such as being brave, or modest.
One of the best ways to develop a healthy sense of self-confidence is to focus on your positive qualities.
The Aristotelian principle, which concentrates on positive experiences, character, and virtues, has served as a basis for positive psychology today.
Practice daily affirmations that highlight what you love about yourself. Doing so will make you see your worth in a healthy sense.
Do not base your self-worth on the opinions of others because it is detrimental to building your own confidence. Instead of worrying about what others may think about your choices, focus on how you feel about them.
If you enjoy wearing certain clothes, engaging in certain activities or making individual choices, that is all that matters.
Put these actions into practice, and you will begin to see your self-confidence rise. Understand that you are stronger than you think while maintaining a balanced sense of others.
This will help you remain kind to others, while still loving yourself wholeheartedly.
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